Crystals for Heartbreak

“Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.”

― Kahlil Gibran
I shall begin with sharing the news of my own recent breakup because I am a fervent believer in upholding the truth and speaking from a place of raw authenticity. It is in this unfiltered sharing of life's secrets and intimacies that we find connection, learn, grow and heal. Please note that I am now writing from a place of groundedness and gratitude. I am happier now than I have been in a long time and recognise that the dissolution of this relationship has been the making of me. I hope this glimpse into my own breakup story resonates with you.
Unannounced, unexpected, it arrived in the fog of the pandemic, when nothing could be clearly seen or understood. The man of promises, of 'strength and honour,' left me struggling for breath on the floor of his parents' dining room and vanished into the night. The man I had devoted my life to for half a decade, gone. Though he never laid a finger on me, my body felt as though it had been mown down by a cruise liner. In 24 hours, we'd gone from engagement rings to endings.
It has been months, now, and I have neither seen nor heard from him.
In a year, we endured what most couples might experience in a lifetime of marriage, if ever. Dances with death, extreme injury, traumatic decisions, and a lot of pain. Words elude me because what we journeyed through is ineffable. There was so much love, too. I was loyal to the end.
He ran away when I needed my partner the most.
In the days that followed, my heart ached. I couldn't eat. I traipsed, drag-footed, around the house in the blue of night. Hope stung, but it was all I had. Unanswered questions rattled around the empty spaces he left behind. Were those years a lie? Did he ever love me? How can an honourable man leave in this callous way? People change, so do hearts, and I acknowledge this, but I was not afforded the dignity or decency of a civil conversation, an explanation. No respectful parting of ways. No closure. Instead, a torturous 3-hour drive with his father in total silence, punctuated by sporadic stops for roadside vomiting. And the next morning, without warning, a removal van arrived, as unexpected as the breakup itself. In a blind panic, like ripping fishhooks out of fingers, I had to detox my life of the last 4.5 years. Memories and pieces of us, slung into the back of a van unceremoniously, without a word.
It may not have been in a church or before the eyes of God, but we made promises with the stars as witness.
A life of promises, shattered like glass. I'd reach to pick up the pieces and end up with bloody fingers. I tried to assimilate the fragments, but they were too fractured. So, instead, I picked myself up, assimilated the pieces of my broken heart. I swept away the splinters of our life together, the ashes of our burnt-out story, and blew them into the air as fairy dust. I have a way of transforming shadows into light, seeing the good in the bad; the blessings in disguise. Alchemy.
Remarkably, in the acceptance of the knowledge that he is not the man I thought he was, I have found a profound sense of peace. I am liberated from a life that was never meant for me. I have let it go like a paper lantern in the dark.
I am have come home to myself:
remembered,
reconnected,
rerooted.
I am healing
Scattering the shadows myself, so that nothing may hide in the dark.
My sense of self-worth and self-respect has been reignited. I am so deeply worthy of love. A love that will embrace my humanness and never run from it. A love that will shelter me in the cold, build a home around me, marvel at my magic, and tenderly hold me like a butterfly in the hand.
You are worthy of a love that rises warm with the sun and looks at you as though maybe you are made of stardust and roses. We all deserve a love so true that it makes itself known simply be being. We all deserve a love that does not need to announce itself, does not need questioning. A love that leaves no room for doubt. That suffuses the spaces of our quiet hearts with music and laughter. That lights candles in the darkest of corners there and keeps the home fires ablaze. A glowing love that lights up the room.
Breakups are breakthroughs.
crystals for heartbreak

Crystals for Heartbreak

Cleopatra is alleged to have revered rose quartz crystals for their heart and wombspace-soothing properties, but there are many crystals whose magic can be harnessed in times of emotional need. Traditionally, there are certain stones for specific emotional ailments (rose quartz serving as the perfect example in matters of the heart) but the reality is that any crystal can be worked with. There is no wrong here, so let that liberate you.

crystals for breakups

 

Rose quartz has always been dubbed the Love Stone due to its rosy hue, as this colour corresponds to the heart chakra and wombspace.

Chakras are energy centres of the body, observed in Eastern medicine. Think of them as organs within a network of rivers and tributaries, no different to a circulatory system. You have an entire energy body operating similarly to a physical one - it is subject to ebbs and flows and blockages. It needs maintaining and caring for, just as your corporeal self does, otherwise it falls out of alignment. In fact, the belief that physical wellness is rooted in emotional and energetic wellness is widespread and becoming increasingly popular. Disease comes from dis-ease in life. When we are truly centred and find harmony in our emotional self, the physical self follows suit and finds its flow. When we live in alignment with our Truth, with the essence of Life, we find flow. This is the ancient Chinese philosophy of the Dao. We find happiness and happiness is health.

pink amethyst crystals

Aside from rose quartz, there are other crystals that would be beneficial presences in the home when navigating a breakup. Apophyllite is the stone for releasing trauma and working through painful emotions, so this is top of our list. Apophyllite crystal is one of our favourites for this reason, but also for its sheer beauty. There is an ethereal, radiant quality to apophyllite. The way in which light travels through its crystalline walls is special. There is something sacred to these stones, which is why they say that angels gather close by.

Clear quartz  would be wonderful when removing someone toxic from your life, or simply cleansing your space and field of stagnant energy, old emotional clutter you no longer need. Unburden yourself, release. Surrender the pain to the universe. Clear quartz crystals are the cleansers and Master Healers of the crystal kingdom, so with them, you'll be in good hands.

crystals for heartbreak

Pink amethyst, being the colour of the heartspace, is a tonic to the energy here, as well as being soothing for the energy of the wombspace (even if you don't have one). Metaphysically, this crystal is rooted in compassion and hums with the frequency of true love, so its presence in your life and space would be most welcome at a time of love loss and heartbreak.

How to Use Crystals During Heartbreak

There is no correct way to work with crystals. Be it a focal point for meditation, a comfort under the pillow at night, or a power-kick when popped into bras and pockets before leaving the house, a crystal undeniably offers a lot of magic. At times of heartbreak and emotional ebbs, we like to meditate with Nina from Yiflow on our Instagram and place a crystal either on the chest, when in savasana (lying down), or in both palms, when seated. Allow the energy of the selected stones to wash over and through you - the chakras on the palms are directly connected to the heart chakra, making this a very powerful placement of crystals. Work with a pinky-red or green coloured stone for maximum heart chakra energy.

Another way in which you can work through a breakup with the aid of crystals is to create a crystal grid with one of our SPiRitual Kits, designed lovingly with relationships and love at the heart of it: see Heartspace.

Lastly, sleeping with a crystal close to the bed or beneath it, and even under the pillow, can be really comforting during times of restlessness and breakup-induced anxiety. When you're lying in bed, waiting for sleep to visit, place it on your chest and allow the weight of it resting there to permeate your heartspace. Visualise your heart chakra as a glowing orb of soft pink light, filling up and expanding, brighter and brighter, the more energy you receive from the crystal. You can even weave in positive, healing affirmations, such as "I am worthy of love," "I am whole," "I have all I need."

Remember, you can do no wrong here. Always go for the crystals that call to you, and they will. Go for what you gravitate towards and feel your way with this. Whichever speaks to you and makes your heart flutter is intended for you. This is your intuition speaking. Be open. Heed it. Heal.

May you find the resilience and strength to journey through this. May angels support and guide you in the form of family, friends, or flowers and pets. May you know kindness. May you grow profoundly as a person for having experienced this. May you see the opportunity in the breakage, the blessings in disguise. May you receive light where there are shadows. Do not fear the lessons; do not fear the dark, for beautiful things grow there. Trust yourself. Trust the process. Trust time. May love always find you.

Olivia x

 


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